MIMICS & MISCREANTS
Adventure. Make Bad Decisions. Die.
(by Velexiraptor at A Blasted, Cratered Land)
Gestate a Murderhobo
1. Roll 3d6 for each of your character’s ability scores: STRength, DEXterity, CONstitution, INTelligence, WISdom, and CHArisma. If you dislike your scores, you may invert them (subtract each of your scores from 21 and replace them with the result). Then, either reallocate them as you wish, or get a Reward roll.
2. Pick a Folk (or roll a random Folk and get a Reward roll), reroll Folk ability scores until higher
3. Pick a Calling (or roll a random Calling and get a Reward roll). Start at level 1, get starting items from Calling, roll a Calling skill.
4. Roll a random item from each of Weapons/Gear/Bonus, take Starting Items, and roll a random skill.
5. Fill in Armor if you’re wearing any, fill in starting HP (the max value of your Hit Dice).
6. If you have any Reward Rolls, roll that many times on the Random Rewards table and take your favorite result.
7. Roll how your character knows the character to your left.
(These are not exhaustive lists, feel free to make up your own)
When you do something that has a chance to fail in an interesting way, roll a d20 and add the relevant ability score. ≥20 is a success, <20 is a failure. Rolling of your own volition is a Test. When forced to roll by something else, it’s a Save.
Rolling a natural 20 is a critical success, in which the best case scenario occurs. A natural 1 is a critical failure, and the worst case scenario occurs. If you have advantage, roll twice and take the better result. If you have disadvantage, roll twice and take the worse result. Having a relevant skill gives you advantage, or cancels out disadvantage. Ties always go to the player.
Sometimes an effect will tell you to step up (increase) or step down (decrease) a die. Die sizes go d4 → d6 → d8 → d10 → d12. If you step up a die beyond a d12, add 1 to the result. If you step down below a d4, subtract 1 from the result.
All players make a DEX test. Anyone who succeeds goes before the monsters (or may go after, if they want), in an order of their choice. Anyone who fails goes after the monsters.
On Your Turn
You get one action to do anything including attacking, and one action to do anything but attack. Spellcasting takes both actions.
Only players make Attack rolls (when they attack an NPC) and Defense rolls (when an NPC attacks them). When NPCs are attacking each other, the GM can adjudicate it however they want. If you want PVP in your game, rule it yourself – I don’t allow PVP at my tables.
Hit Points and Wounds
HP represents your ability to shrug off major damage. You can keep fighting until your wounds become incapacitating. You might not want to. At character creation, you start with 1 Hit Die, which by default is a d6. You roll your Hit Die to restore HP. Some Callings or Folk modify the die size. Some Callings also gain more Hit Dice when you level up.
When you’re reduced to half HP (round down) or less, take a Minor Wound of the corresponding damage type. When you’re reduced to 0 or below, take a Major Wound. When you take damage, if you’re at or below 0 HP, roll a d20 over the total amount of damage you’ve taken since you were reduced to 0. If you fail to roll equal or higher, you die.
1. Arquebus: 1d10 ranged firearm damage, two-handed, full turn to reload. On a critical failure, gun jams, must spend a short rest cleaning before firing again.
2. Axe: 1d6 slashing damage, a miss deals minimum damage even when Dodged
3. Bastard Sword: 1d8 slashing damage, step up damage die when two-handing
4. Blunderbuss: 1d12 ranged firearm damage, two-handed, can't hit anyone reliably beyond 15' but fires pretty much anything, full turn to reload. On a critical failure, gun jams, must spend a short rest cleaning before firing again.
5. Boomerang: 1d6 ranged bludgeoning damage, comes back after you throw it except if it deals damage or on a critical failure
6. Bola: 1d4 ranged bludgeoning damage, thrown, target STR saves vs. knockdown
7. Caltrops: 1d4 piercing damage to anyone who moves through caltrops, can throw a bag of caltrops to cover a 10' radius area
8. Chakram: 1d6 ranged slashing damage, thrown, can throw 2 as an action
9. Cleaver: 1d6 slashing damage, on 6+ damage target loses 3 max HP (as minor wound)
10. Club: 1d6 bludgeoning damage, step up damage die when two-handing
11. Crossbow: 1d12 ranged piercing damage, takes two hands to fire, full round to load, test STR to load and fire in the same round
12. Crowbar: 1d6 bludgeoning damage, on 6+ damage halve target’s armor (as minor wound)
13. Dagger: 1d6 piercing or piercing slashing (your choice), melee attacks with DEX, throwable, 3 per inventory slot
14. Falchion: 1d6 slashing damage, on 6+ damage target is disarmed
15. Fire lance: 1d10 fire damage, two-handed, works for 2 rounds from ignition to burnout, hits targets up to 15' away.
16. Flail: 1d6 bludgeoning damage, ignores AC bonuses from shields
17. Flintlock: 1d8 ranged firearm damage, full turn to reload. On a critical failure, gun jams, must spend a short rest cleaning before firing again.
18. Glaive/Naginata: 1d8 slashing damage, two-handed, +1 AC.
19. Greataxe: 1d12 slashing damage, two-handed.
20. Greatbow: 1d12 ranged piercing damage, takes two hands to fire, can’t move and fire in same turn, if STR < 16 must test to fire.
21. Greatsword/Claymore: 1d10 slashing damage, two-handed, on 6+ damage you can make an attack against an adjacent enemy
22. Grenade: 2d6 (minus Armor) firearm damage to everyone within 10', throwable, consumable, on miss roll 1d4: 1. DEX save vs. grenade exploding in your hand, 2. grenade scatters 1d10' in a random direction, 3. grenade explodes next turn, 4. grenade explodes in 2 turns.
23. Halberd: 1d8 slashing damage, two-handed, enemies you hit are pushed 5’ in a direction of your choice.
24. Handaxe: 1d6 slashing damage, throwable
25. Iklwa/Short Spear: 1d6 piercing and slashing damage
26. Javelin: 1d6 piercing damage, can be thrown, takes up 1/2 an inventory slot
27. Katar: step up unarmed damage die and change damage type to slashing, counts as an unarmed attack
28. Khopesh: 1d6 slashing damage, on 6+ damage target loses 1 HP per round (save ends)
29. Knuckledusters: step up unarmed damage die, counts as an unarmed attack
30. Longbow: 1d8 ranged piercing damage, takes 2 hands to fire, if STR < 14 must test to fire
31. Mace: 1d6 bludgeoning damage, on 6+ damage break target’s limb
32. Maul: 1d10 bludgeoning damage, two-handed, on 10+ damage knock target down
33. Meteor hammer: 1d8 bludgeoning damage, two-handed, can make attacks as if dual-wielding
34. Morningstar: 1d6 piercing damage, on 6+ damage target loses 1 HP per round (save ends)
35. Nunchucks: 1d6 bludgeoning damage, when you hit you can make an extra attack after for d4 bludgeoning damage
36. Pike: 1d8 piercing damage, two-handed, double melee reach, on 8+ damage can impale target
37. Quarterstaff: 1d6 bludgeoning damage, can make attacks as if dual-wielding when two-handing
38. Rapier: 1d6 piercing damage, melee attacks with DEX, lets you Parry attacks when you Take It.
39. Sabre: 1d6 slashing damage, on 6+ damage remove target’s finger
40. Scythe: 1d8 slashing damage, two-handed, double melee reach, can attack two adjacent enemies and split damage.
41. Shortbow: 1d6 ranged piercing damage, takes two hands to fire
42. Short sword: 1d6 piercing or slashing damage, lets you Parry attacks when you Take It
43. Shuriken: 1d4 ranged slashing damage, thrown, can throw 2 as an action, 6 per inventory slot
44. Sling: 1d6 ranged bludgeoning damage, can throw anything fist-sized or smaller
45. Spear: 1d6 piercing damage, can be thrown, you can make a free attack against enemies closing to melee with shorter weapons
46. Stiletto: 1d4 piercing damage, can be thrown, 3 per inventory slot, can be well-hidden on person
47. Sword: 1d6 slashing damage, step up damage die when two-handing, lets you Parry attacks when you Take It
48. War Pick: 1d6 piercing damage, on 6+ damage reduces target's armor by 1
49. Warhammer: 1d6 bludgeoning damage, step up damage die when two-handing, minor wound is always Knockdown
50. Whip: 1d4 bludgeoning damage, double melee reach, can grab an object or limb on hit instead of dealing damage.
Level 1: Danger Sense, Loincloth Armor, Rage, 1 Rage Die
Level 2: Battle Rage, +1 RD, +HD
Level 3: Master of Men and Beasts, +1 RD, +HD
Level 4: Horde, +1 RD, +HD
Hit Die: d12 when unarmored (see Loincloth Armor)
Starting Equipment: Enough cloth to maintain bare minimum of decency, weapon of choice, random weapon, conduit
Skills (d6): 1. Gladiation, 2. Hunting, 3. Mountaineering, 4. Pillaging, 5. Sailing, 6. Violence
Danger Sense: You have a level-in-4 chance to act in surprise rounds.
Loincloth Armor: For every 2 points of armor you’re wearing, step down your hit die size. If you put armor on after you roll your hit points, decrease your HP by HD*2.
Rage: Pick a Conduit to channel your furious berserker rage. You gain its Passive benefit. You have Rage Dice, which are d4s. When you want to enter a rage, roll any number of your Rage Dice. Your rage lasts for (sum) minutes. Rage Dice burn out on 3s or 4s, and only return on a daily or long rest. When you roll doubles or triples on your Rage Dice, you get the related effect from your Conduit.
While raging, you get an extra attack each round, (sum) bonus temporary Hit Points, and can use the Active benefit at the cost of cutting (dice) minutes off your rage. You can't take any actions that don't contribute to you brutally murdering things while you're raging, and it automatically expires when all enemies are dead, subdued, or driven off, regardless of how much time is left. You can try to end your rage early on a 1-in-4.
Battle Rage: When you're raging, you have access to a Fighting Style of your choice.
Master of Men and Beasts: When you personally defeat an enemy in single combat without killing them, you have a Barbarian level-in-6 chance to recruit them as a hireling if they have any concept of loyalty. Each time you daily rest, roll again to maintain their loyalty – if you fail, they might turn on you again, or just slip off into the night.
Horde: Your reputation has spread far and wide. Once, ever, you can muster up a great horde a thousand strong over the course of a month. They flock to your banner, and will follow you until your death, defeat, or humiliation. Refusing to lead them personally, or throw yourself into combat with the reckless abandon they do, will lose their loyalty.
Passive: You can tell what a drug might do by handling/sampling a bit of it. You can also hook people up with some good stuff cause you know the right people, and you can tell what drugs someone’s on with a glance. Become a drug connoisseur! Sample poisons! Experiment! Also, begin with 2d6 doses of a drug of your choice, and d6 doses of something else.
Active: You can consume a dose of your drug to instantly end your rage.
1. Exhale the drug or poison you’ve most recently taken. People close to you must CON save or be affected by the drug or poison for (sum) rounds. You continue to breathe out drug stuff for dice hours.
2. When you damage an enemy, they must CON save or suffer your drug’s overdose effect for (dice) rounds. For (dice) hours, any person you touch has to CON save or suffer the overdose effects for (sum) minutes.
3. You gain the effects of (dice) drugs you’ve ingested of your choice. You suffer the dependency effects of those drugs for (dice) hours.
4. You become immune to a harmful liquid/powder/paste inside of you/that you ingest. You suffer its effects for (dice) rounds, but make your CON save with a (dice) bonus, and if you pass all of them, the effects of the substance end.
1. When you take damage, (dice) small homunculi crawls out of the wound. They have (dice) HP, and when they die or touch someone, they explode for (dice) damage (you’re unaffected) and cause all creatures within 10 feet to CON save or be affected by a drug of your choice. You direct them. They keep crawling out of your mouth for (dice) hours, and you don’t control them. If they’re prevented from escaping, they explode inside you for (dice) damage.
2. You’re immune to a method of exposure to drugs of your choice. (Piercing, slashing, snorting, ear dropper, etc.). You’re vulnerable to that method of exposure for (dice) hours. If it’s a type of damage that can be inflicted by weapons, you either take 2x the damage total or gain a Major Wound, your choice. If it’s inhalation, you automatically fail your CON saves against gaseous things, etc.
3. Your blood is horrifically corrosive. Anyone within 10 feet of you when you take damage takes (sum) acid damage (CON save for half). Metallic or organic objects are degraded by this stuff. This substance turns into a gas that has the same effect with radius equal to 10 * (dice) when your Rage ends. Run!
4. Roll twice on Doubles.
Passive: You are nature, red in tooth and claw. Step up the damage die for your unarmed attacks, and they can deal slashing damage instead of bludgeoning if you so choose.
Active: When you inflict a wound with slashing damage, you can eat what you took. Immediately gain the benefit of a random Butcher Cut until your Rage ends.
1. You can make an additional unarmed attack each round with your teeth, but for the next day you can't get the benefits of rations except from creatures you've killed with your bare hands.
2. Your blood boils out your eyes, mouth, and nose, creating a red mist that obscures other creatures' vision for dice*10' around you, but all that blood loss deals (dice)d4 damage to you.
3. The stench of battle and rage attracts (dice) HD of fellow local predatory animals that'll go for your enemies first, but after your rage ends you're gonna be their next meal.
4. Your melee attacks deal slashing, piercing, and bludgeoning damage. Once you engage a target, you can't change targets until they're dead.
1. When you kill an enemy, they explode into chunks of meaty gore that force anyone they hit to WIS save vs. fear, but anyone who passes the save flies into a 1-die Hunger rage.
2. When you deal maximum damage to an enemy you wound them as if you’d dealt double damage, but enemies have advantage on damage rolls against you.
3. You can tear off spontaneous cancerous growths of yourself out to throw as impromptu Grenades (see Weapons) that deal (dice)d4 acid damage, but doing this deals (dice)d4 slashing damage to you, and not throwing any leaves you with unsightly growths that give you -(dice) Charisma, -(dice) Constitution, and -(sum) max HP until your next long rest.
4. Roll twice on Doubles.
Passive: You are supernaturally calm. You cannot be frightened or charmed. Nothing will sway you from your grim mission.
Active: When you pass a save, you can force another creature in the combat within range of the effect to save against it instead.
1. You can sense life and emotional states for 100' around you. You feel their pain and take (dice) psychic damage whenever they take damage.
2. You can foresee attacks. When you dodge, you may redirect the attack towards someone else within range. Your movement is halved.
3. Multiply your move speed and jump height by (dice), and you can climb at your move speed. When you take damage you're knocked down.
4. You are immovable. Effects cannot slow you, stop you, or push you, and you're immune to environmental damage, but you cannot move in any direction besides towards an enemy.
1. You astrally project your mind from your body, become intangible, move at double speed, and deal psychic damage with your attacks, but your meat body is a drooling immobile husk.
2. Your blows connect with immense strength. All your attacks deal maximum damage, but you take maximum damage from all attacks.
3. With each repetition, you strike somewhere new. Treat all enemies who can hear your mantra as adjacent to you even if they aren't nearby, but when you hit someone or are hit by someone you are teleported next to them.
4. Roll twice on Doubles.
Level 1: Butchery, 4 Cuts
Level 2: Corpse Rendering, +2 Cuts, +HD
Level 3: You Are What You Eat, +2 Cuts, +HD
Level 4: Apex Predator, +2 Cuts
Hit Die: d6
Starting Equipment: Cleaver (d6, use to prepare Cuts and turn corpses into edible meat), cutting board, whetstone, cauldron
Skills (d6): 1. Cooking, 2. Farming, 3. Fishing, 4. Interrogation, 5. Hunting, 6. Undertaking
Butchery: Take a freshly-killed corpse and, in ten minutes, turn it into a Cut you’ve learned. Any character can eat a Cut to get its effects. The rest of the creature can be consumed as rations. Uneaten Cuts go stale, and all eaten Cuts’ effects wear off, at end of day. (HD) in a Cut’s effect refers to the originating monster's hit die size.
Corpse Rendering: Instead of making a Cut, you can take an hour and use a large cauldron of boiling water to render a corpse into thaumaturgical lard, which behaves as a Butcher-exclusive scroll. Monsters render into spells relevant to their place in the ecosystem or their abilities (ex. giant spider → spider climb, purple worm → passwall, goblin thief → knock, bandit captain → command). Spellcasters render into a random spell known in life.
You Are What You Eat: Whenever you eat a Cut that gives you a bonus, you may roll a d4 above the number of mutations you have to retain that ability indefinitely as a mutation. If you fail, your body violently rejects all your current beneficial mutations, and your HP is halved until you return to town and eat some real, non-monstrous meals. You may voluntarily purge all beneficial mutations from this ability during any rest.
Apex Predator: Whenever you deal maximum damage to a creature, you can make a random Cut from it. This is in addition to Cuts you butcher from its corpse.
1. Marrow: Heal (HD) hp.
2. Sirloin: Get +1 to the monster's highest ability score.
3. Fillet: You have advantage on your next (HD) rolls.
4. Trotters: Double your overland and movement speed.
5. Shank: This Cut is a bludgeoning weapon that deals (HD)-1 damage and has a 1 in 6 chance to poison.
6. Stewed Head: All who gaze upon your twisted visage WIS save vs. fear (including allies).
7. Rump: Counts as a full day's worth of rations for a party, or a week's worth for a single person.
8. Sweetmeats: Immediately CON save to cure one chosen disease, poison, or other condition currently afflicting you.
9. Paté: You become highly suggestible, as under the effects of a Charm Person spell.
10. Raw Dripping Heart: You enter a 1-die Barbarian Rage. Whenever you take damage while raging, WIS save or it ends.
11. Hindbrain: You get the fractured, dizzying memories of the monster's past (HD) days.
12. Forebrain: You get a random skill the monster possessed in life.
13. Steamed Genitals: WIS save vs. sleep. If you succeed, you become calm and suggestible (as Suggestion).
14. Blood Pudding: Exsanguinates from inside-out. -2 STR/DEX/CON.
15. Lard: When thrown, acts as a 1-die Grease spell. Flammable.
16. Tongue: You can speak to and understand creatures of this type.
17. Bone Stew: Your nails and teeth become long and wicked sharp, giving you an (HD) natural weapon.
18. Offal: CON save vs. poison. Can be applied to weapons or surfaces, or covertly slipped into food.
19. Caviar: Causes delusions of grandeur. Others need to CHA save or see you as higher social standing than them, but you need to WIS save to remember that you aren't actually higher social standing than them
20. Soul Food: You can ask one question of the monster’s spirit before it passes on. It must answer truthfully, though may answer maliciously (you are eating it, after all).
Level 1: Dungeon Architect, Diagrammer, additional class skill
Level 2: Dis/Assembler, Stonespeaker
Level 3: Juryrigger, count as 3 people for Dungeon Architect, can use Stonespeaker on items/structures
Level 4: Master Builder, count as 6 people for Dungeon Architect
Hit Die: d6
Starting Equipment: Toolbox, helmet with integrated lamp, drafting papers, crowbar (stats as war pick), telescope
Skills (d6): 1. Architecture, 2. Art, 3. Cartography, 4. Mining, 5. Tactics, 6. Tinkering
Dungeon Architect: With ten minutes and your toolbox, you can:
– make a trap or other mechanism trigger when a specific condition is met, or at a chosen time.
– secure doors so they can't be opened without breaking them down, as a Lock spell.
– hide features of constructed environments (like a door or arrow slot in a wall, or grease or a rune on a floor).
– break down or erect 10' of mundane walls, or excavate an equivalent amount of material (roughly a 5' cube).
With 3 people, you can do this an additional time in ten minutes. With 6 people, you can do this 2 more times; with 10 people, 3 more times, etc.
Diagrammer: After seeing the outside of a location, you can roughly sketch its inner plan. From inside a room, you can roughly sketch adjoining rooms that you know about.
Dis/Assembler: You deal damage to constructs and structures with advantage, and can choose the wounds you deal. You can also repair structures and constructs (d6 HP per 10 minutes working on them).
Stonespeaker: You can deduce the goings-on in a room by analyzing the layout and the scuffs on the floors, walls, and furniture. In a room, you may ask a question of the space like a Speak With Dead spell. Do this only once per room.
Juryrigger: With a day's work, you can build a device that replicates the effect of a magic item you have access to. It works once, then breaks. You can also overclock a magic item (that wasn't created this way), doubling its function once, then breaking it.
Master Builder: You can make an INT test to build something from Dungeon Architect in 1 round. If you fail, it’ll take the normal amount of time. Anything you build or repair is twice as tough, items you use have an additional use (including items from Juryrigger), and you can build complex triggers and moving parts into your machines.
Level 1: Consecrated Weapon, Detect Heresy
Level 2: Divine Rituals, Holy Mount, 1 Miracle, +HD
Level 3: Not Finished Yet, +1 Miracle, +HD
Level 4: True Believer, +1 Miracle, +HD
Hit Die: d8
Starting Equipment: Chain shirt, chain legs, heavy shield, holy symbol, holy book, consecrated weapon of choice
Skills (d6): 1. Conviction, 2. Divine Will, 3. Law, 4. Soldiering, 5. Tactics, 6. Zealotry
Consecrated Weapon: Pick a Cleric Domain. While you’re wielding a consecrated weapon, for each command you have followed on a turn when you make an attack, you can add one of the following effects to your attack:
1. Smite: Step up damage die
2. Divine Guidance: Negate disadvantage
3. Holy Warrior: Treat attack as having an applicable Fighting Style from the Fighter list
4. Aura of Fear: If you hit, enemy must WIS save vs. fleeing for turns equal to your Paladin level
5. Savior: If you hit, target focuses on attacking you next turn.
6. Sinseer: If you hit, instantly fully Detect Heresy on the target.
Detect Heresy: By meditating in a location for 10 minutes, you can feel the presence of heretical deeds that contravene the commandments of your domain. Every additional 10 minutes you spend gives you another piece of information:
– Specific commands violated
– Precise location of heresy in location
– Detect heresies up to 24 hours ago
Divine Rituals: You can invoke Miracles as a Cleric, but you require 10 minutes of uninterrupted prayer and holy rituals to do so.
Holy Mount: With 10 minutes of prayer and ritual, you can summon your divine mount, which takes the form of an animal associated with your Domain. It obeys your commands unquestioningly and it is large enough to ride. You can dismiss it at any time. If it dies, you cannot summon it again for a week. It doesn’t need food, water, or sleep.
Not Finished Yet: When you would take a fatal blow, you can return to life empowered by divinity until your current adventure is concluded. You heal all wounds and ability damage, gain a Paladin Level, and return to maximum HP. When your adventure ends, or when you take an action that directly contravenes your Domain’s commands, you pass on immediately.
True Believer: You can invoke Miracles as part of a weapon attack. You still need to be obeying Commands to do so.
Level 1: Advantageous Terrain, Loyal Companion
Level 2: Hated Foe, Pragmatic Survivalist, +1 Terrain, +1 random class skill, +HD
Level 3: +1 Terrain, +1 Foe, +1 Style or Cut or Spell or Miracle, +1 random class skill, +HD
Level 4: +1 Terrain, +1 Foe, +2 Styles or Cuts or Spells or Miracles in any combination, +1 random class skill
Hit Die: d6
Starting Equipment: Leather gambeson and greaves, ranged weapon of choice w/ 20 ammo, melee weapon of choice, animal feed, 3 rations, flint and steel, tinderbox, bedroll, spyglass
Skills (d10): 1. Animal Handling, 2. Cooking, 3. Cartography, 4. Foraging, 5. Hermitry, 6. Herbology, 7. Hunting, 8. Languages, 9. Lumberjackry, 10. Yeomanship
Advantageous Terrain: Pick a terrain when you get this feature. You travel at double speed through this terrain. When a fight breaks out in your chosen terrain, you can add plausible terrain features. In addition, while travelling in this terrain, you can reroll one weather or encounter die per day, one skill roll per hour, and one attack roll per combat.
Loyal Companion: You have a mundane animal pet (HD = level) that is loyal to you and only you. You two can understand each other perfectly. It will do anything for you, even putting itself in harm's way. It levels up with you and gains HD and thematic abilities. If it dies, you can spend a week during a long rest finding and training a new pet.
Pragmatic Survivalist: You have a Fighting Style from the Fighter or Adept lists, know how to prepare a Cut from the Butcher list, can cast a Spell from a Wizard list of your choice, and invoke a Miracle from a Cleric domain of your choice (as if you had 1 Cleric level).
Hated Foe: Pick an enemy type. You get advantage on attacks against them, step up your damage dice against them, and can track them through any of your terrains.
d50 Random Spells
Summon Tables (continued)